Duck Jokes

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? click to show

Which side of the duck has the most feathers? click to show

A duck walks into a feed store and asks, “Got any duck feed?”

The clerk tells him, “No, we don’t have a market for it so we don’t carry it.”

The duck says, “Okay,” and leaves.

The next day, the duck again walks in to the feed store and asks, “Got any duck feed?” Again the clerk says no and the duck leaves.

Next day, the duck once again walks in, and asks, “Got any duck feed?” The clerk says, “I’ve told you twice, we don’t have duck feed, we’ve never had duck feed and we never will have duck feed. If you ask me again, I’ll nail your feet to the floor.” The duck leaves.

The next day, the duck walks in and asks, “Got any nails?”

“No.”

“Got any duck feed?”

What do you call a crate of ducks? click to show

What time does a duck wake up? click to show

This dot to dot (connect the dots) puzzle is a lot of fun.

You can print the puzzle. It is great for use in Sunday school, Bible class, Vacation Bible School or just for free kid fun.

Solomon is anointed and becomes King Solomon (after his father King David).

Don’t just do the puzzle but do some Bible study about King Solomon in the Old Testament.

We will work hard to bring you more free puzzles, free worksheets and free games.

Be sure to tell your friends, Sunday school teachers and others about ChurchFun.com.

Zadok the priest took the horn of oil from the sacred tent and anointed Solomon. Then they sounded the trumpet and all the people shouted, “Long live King Solomon!”

1 Kings 1:39 (NIV)

One of the most important factors in your happiness is your ability to make friends. Some people are naturally shy and have a problem reaching out to others no matter how desperately they want to. Other people have trouble connecting with kids their age because they feel like they’re different. Some people have problems that interfere with their social skills. Whatever the reason a person is having problems associating with others, here are some ideas that can help. These are 5 ways you can help yourself and others make friends:

~~ 1. Get Involved

Whatever you enjoy doing find a group to do it with. If you like acting, art or athletics there are organized groups that will not only let you enjoy the activity but will also let you meet people who share your interest.

If you enjoy playing sports like soccer or baseball, join a team. If you feel unsure about your sports skills, take time to practice batting, kicking, pitching and catching- whatever skills are involved in the sport. You don’t have to be the best. Just do your best.

Do the same thing if your interests are chess or computers, for example.

If you haven’t decided on a specific interest yet, you might enjoy becoming a Boy Scout or a Girl Scout. Organizations such as these offer children a wide variety of activities they can enjoy.

~~ 2. Learn Some Common Social Rules

If you treat others with respect you will naturally attract more friends and have more meaningful relationships in school and at church. To help make friends, learn the common social rules. The “golden rule” is “Treat others like you want them to treat you.” This means, no hitting, stealing, cheating, lying, yelling or being mean in any way. Share your stuff and try to be nice so other people will want to be your friend.

~~ 3. Let Your Parents Get Involved

Another way you can make friends is to let your parents get involved with school and church. Whenever your parents volunteer with PTA, with the church youth group, as Sunday school teachers, soccer coaches or other things you’re involved with they’ll be able to meet your friends and your friends’ parents. This will make your family the center of the fun. Other kids will get to know you and your parents. Other mom and dads are going to want their kids to be around you if your parents are super involved.

~~ 4. Have Your Whole Family Communicate With Other Parents

This will make you over-the-top popular.

You may be embarrassed by your parents, everyone is sometimes. But, if other parents get to know you and your parents know your friends you will be much better off because you will get to hang out a lot more. It will help you make friends. It will also let your parents meet the the other kids parents.

Here’s an idea, tell your mom or dad who you want to be friends with in school or at church. Then, ask your parents to call some of your friends’ parents to invite them and their children over.

~~ 5. Communicate by Talking and Listening

Being a friend means more than just doing fun stuff. It means helping others. If you don’t have two-way communication with your friends, then you can’t help them. Talk to them about any problems they’re having and offer to help them if you can. Be careful because your friend may not want or need your help right then, but it is important to be willing to help and to let your friend know you want to do whatever you can to help.

Don’t try to jump in and solve your friend’s problems for them. Part of growing up is learning how to deal with different situations, no matter how difficult they may be.

~~ 6 Bonus Idea — PRAY for Your Friends

You might not know everything that is going on in a person’s life but you can pray for them anyway.

This started out as a crazy idea, “What if beavers started taking up golf as a pastime? Children golfers would like the golf joke while enjoying a fun, clean joke for a sketch.

The beaver is ready to go on the golf course, he has a golf bag full of golf clubs. I think he has all the golf equipment.

You have to wonder what his golf handicap is. He’s been visiting the club golf pro to get some tips and has even spent a lot of money on golf packages at the golf proshop.

I don’t think he’s quite up to joining the PGA or even the LPGA. But you never know.

Hey, if nothing else he will be able to dive in find his golf ball if he hits it into the water.

Preparation time: 10 minutes (but banana must be frozen for at least 8 hours)

Ingredients:

* 1 medium banana
* 2 tablespoons of milk or apple juice
* Chocolate syrup to drizzle or a tablespoon of peanut butter

Preparation:

Cut one medium banana into half-inch pieces. Place in a zip locked baggie and put in the freezer overnight, or for 8 hours. Place frozen banana pieces and 2 tablespoons of milk or apple juice in a blender. Pulse until chopped and then blend until mashed. Put into bowl and drizzle with chocolate syrup or dollop with a tablespoon of peanut butter.

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We have another fun free online game for you. It’s called Sushi Go-Round and it’s brought to you by Miniclip Games. We want to bring you free online games that you and your friends can enjoy. This happens to be a personal favorite of our very own Meghan from our Totally Delicious Food segment. We hope you enjoy this fun and free sushi game! Sayonara!
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This missile is scared to follow his exploding command.

When you play games do you get scared from just free online games like Missile Command? Probably not. We know that they are just fun video games.

But there are things in life that can be scary. You know what?…when things scare me there is only one thing that helps me get by….

It is my faith in God. He will never fail me. So I trust him, and I do get frightened a little sometimes but then I remind myself that God is in charge and is taking care of me. I

In fact he is greater than ANYTHING in the world.

In Him,

Professor QB

You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.

1 John 4:4 (NIV)

This is a fun game you can play with friends when you want something fun to do. Some people call this free paper game a “cootie catcher” and some people call this free paper game a “paper fortune teller. ”

We just call it fun. Don’t worry, we give you step by step instructions so you don’t have to be an expert at origami in order to fold up this paper game.

You may have seen these before. We have complete download instructions, printing and folding instructions and ideas for game play.

This makes a fun way to spend time with your friends and can be fun in the car.

Now, as Christians we know that there is no such thing as a real fortune teller. This is just a fun game. Don’t take it too seriously ’cause that takes all the fun out of the game. Just play with your friends and enjoy. If you as silly questions you can get some really silly answers.

Here is the link to download the printable sheet

Learning the books of the New Testament is a lot of fun. You can memorize all twenty-seven books of the New Testament with this fun, easy song.

You can sing it in the car, before bed-time or any time you want to remember the books of the New Testament.

It also helps you when you are looking up passages of Scripture in the New Testament.

Turn your speakers on and play the song several times. Sing along and before long you too will know all the books of the New Testament.

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.