Professor QB’s Funny Five “Pig Jokes”
Professor QB’s Funny Five
A man was driving down the road in the country. He looked over and saw a baby pig in the field. He stopped and picked up the pig. He was driving around town with the pig in the car and a cop sees him and pulls him over.
Cop asks “Hey, What are you doing with that pig in the car?”
The driver says “Well, I just found the pig beside the road in the field.”
The cop says” I want you to take that pig to the zoo!”
The driver agrees he will take the pig to the zoo.
The next day the cop sees the guy driving around again and pulls him over. “I thought I told you to take that pig to the zoo! What are you doing?”
What’s a pig’s favorite ballet?
A clown is walking down the street with a pig under his arm. He passes a person who asks “Where did you get that?”click to show
On a drive in the country, a city slicker noticed a farmer lifting a pig up to an apple tree and holding the pig there as it ate one apple after another.
“Maybe I don’t know what I’m talking about,” said the city slicker, “but if you just shook the tree so the apples fell to the ground, wouldn’t it save a lot of time?” click to show
A traveler lost his way when suddenly something caught his eye - it looked like a pig with a wooden leg!
He drove into the farmyard and said to the farmer, “I was just driving by and I noticed something that I just had to stop and ask about. Is that your pig out there with a wooden leg?”
The farmer smiled. “Oh, that would be old Caesar you saw. He’s the finest pig a man could ever hope to have - and smart! Well, let me tell you a little about that pig. You see that oil well? Old Caesar sniffed out the oil and dug in the mud ’til we saw the crude oil bubbling up. Now that well brings me in about $120,000 every year.
“There’s another thing, too, a little more personal. One night a couple of years ago I tripped and knocked over a lamp and was knocked out cold. That started a fire in the house and old Caesar smelled the smoke. He came in the back door, got the wife and kid out, roused me and got me out.
“There is no question about it - that night old Caesar saved all our lives and you know that is not the sort of thing a man is going to forget too easily.”
The traveler said, “This is all amazing! I have never heard of a pig like this before! This is fantastic! But tell me, how did he get that wooden leg? Was he in a wreck or something?”
