What do you do when you have a good friend who suddenly starts putting you down? They start saying mean things about you and don’t want you to hang around with anyone but them. What do you do?
If your friend puts you down for the things you do well, try to see if your friend is really jealous or just being honest (but in a thoughtless way). What might seem like a deliberate attempt to put you down might actually be your friend trying to tell you that people are tired of hearing about your new boyfriend or girlfriend or the “A+” you got on the test.
Put yourself in your friend’s shoes and understand the reasons behind his or her feelings. Jealousy often stems from insecurity. If you have a friend you love you would still get tired of being compared to all the great things he or she does all the time.
Get a second opinion. If your friend is making comments that seem to stem from jealousy, have someone else around who can look at the situation objectively like a parent or a youth worker form church. If they’re not present, seek their opinion afterwords.
Show a positive attitude to let the jealous friend know that they have no power over you and that you are very confident about yourself. If you are not confident to begin with, you should start working on your self confidence before you worry about their jealousy.
Help your friend raise their self-esteem and build a life that they can be proud of instead of looking enviously at yours. Be sure to mention things you like and admire about your friend as a person, skills you admire and good things about their family
Empowering them is a good way to diffuse their jealousy, and the only way to really do that is to get them to know God. Offer to show them how you, got your hair that way, where you found that shirt, how you got the killer job, but most importantly, why God is such a big part of your life.
Cheer for and praise your friends when something goes right for them. But whatever you do, don’t hide your own happiness for what is going right in your life. Don’t gloat but do share. A true friend supports at all times and should be happy for your accomplishments.
Honestly tell the friend how the way they are acting is hurting your friendship. Ask them to go with you to talk to a trusted adult like a Bible teacher, ministry, youth worker or parent. Friends shouldn’t need to be treated like babies and if this is what your friend expects, it is time to help them develop more realistic expectations.
Most important be praying for your friend everyday.